Sister friends are the best. These are women who decorate your life with glittery sass, sharp wit, and frequent “girrrrrrrrrllll, did you hear about…” moments. You laugh with them, you cry with them, you shop with them.

And occasionally you talk about your eggs with them.

Yep, the ones in your ovaries.

A lunch with my sister friend Ashley last winter included one such egg conversation. Ashley is a spunky and hilarious black girl who enjoys her career, loves being married to her college beau, and nurturing their three beautiful children.

While enjoying our food we talked about life, relationships, and kids. She mentioned a married couple we’re both friends with and wondered if they’d started working on a family.

That question led to some words about our eggs, how they don’t get any younger and how a friend told her, “Everybody ain’t gonna have a testimony like Sarah’s from the Bible…”

Well, she was right.

After more conversation about our ovaries, she asked, “Mel, how old are you?”

“36,” I replied as I ate more fried chicken.

“Mel, your eggs ain’t getting any younger either,” she shared, with a raised eyebrow, in her Chattanooga southern accent.

“Well, that may be true, but whatever babies the Lord has destined to come from these eggs, He’s already planned them out in eternity past and when He says it’s time they will enter into eternity present,” I responded as I ate even more chicken and dashed on some hot sauce.

“Girl, you right,” Ashley laughed. We finished up lunch. But her words stayed with me and I thought more about my eggs.

I find sometimes there’s this tension singles collide with – the tension to follow the script of what people think you should be doing with your life – getting married, having babies, and living the dream of finding your happily ever after – and the reality of where you actually are.

Especially if you’re in the land of the 30s and people keep asking you when are you going to get married? Or do you want to get married, do you want to have children?

But life is not a Hallmark Channel movie where love and “the perfect man” find you when you want them to. Happily ever afters don’t always materialize. Often you have to trade the happy for the real ever afters.

I believe the real ever afters include surrender. God invites us to willingly enter into the story He’s writing for each of us.

This means laying down our expectations and entitlements.

As I choose to lay these things down, the life I live becomes richer than the life I felt entitled to receive. New developments in my story continue to encourage me.

Trusting God with my eggs, and my future sounds pretty funny to say. But it’s true. I’m eager to invite Him into my rollercoaster ride of romance and relationships. His undeniable wisdom guides me well.

Melody Copenny

About Melody Copenny

Melody Copenny is a poet, writer, author and storyteller living a gospel-centered life. A native of Atlanta, GA, she’s called Orlando, FL home since 2005 and been a member of the Discovery Church family for 12 years. Presently she serves as editor in chief for the Discovery Women's Ministry blog, Cherished. She's passionate about the intersection of creativity, words, theology and popular culture and writes to be real, relevant and reveal. A healthy foodie who enjoys cooking well, classic soul and R&B and serving a women’s group at Discovery, she blogs regularly on themes about grieving, mourning, living and loving at www.findingmelodie.com. You can connect to Mel on Twitter & Instagram @findingmelodie.

5 Comments

  • Susan says:

    Thanks for sharing! I remember when my sister was dealing with the stigma of children and getting married. She had twins at 38 and my sister in law had her last child at 46. If it is God’s will it will happen.

  • There’s so much wisdom here, Melody, for all of life and all the complicated things we wait for.

    • Michele, thank you so much for your words! I’m grateful the Lord helps me process my life with His wisdom as it meets my humanity. And yes, so many complicated things we wait for indeed.

  • kim dupree says:

    The prospect of motherhood looms over every woman like it needs plucking from the sky. But you got it, “His undeniable wisdom…”

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